Who are the happiest people? These are people who smile a lot? Or rich people? Or maybe it's the people who have a large family? The answer is not so clear. But one thing is certain: everyone wants to be happy, regardless of gender, age and religion.

To go to happiness, you must first know what it is like. It is even more difficult. Happiness - is the goal, the state or the process? Or could it be that happy people are born under a lucky star? Let's try to sort this out and separate the wheat from the chaff.

What is happiness?

It's the eternal question such as "what is the meaning of life? ". And find the answer has long been trying the greatest minds of humanity. The famous Greek philosopher Epicurus believed that the key to happiness lies in getting the most out of life. Another well-known Greek philosopher Diogenes contrary believed that true happiness is possible only if the ascetic way of life, because in this way you do not get attached to material goods and it is truly free.

But it is not only philosophers pointed out in search of the answer to this question. Some psychologists believe that the state of happiness is achieved in meeting the person's needs. According to the theory of the famous psychologist Abraham Maslow, a person has a lower needs (food, water, sleep, comfort and safety) and the highest (love, respect, beauty and knowledge, as well as self-realization). He believed that must first be satisfied the needs of the lower and then higher. The basis for the realization of happiness Maslow believed in creativity: by definition, happy people - a self-actualizing people.

First Steps to Happiness

All these scientific concepts are very interesting, but most women care about a specific question: "How to be happy? ". Their attention will be offered short and ready to translate into practice tips:

• Do not focuses on the bad in your life. The bad is happening, and it is inevitable. However, the happy people just experience negative events, and try to focus on the good.
• Notes that the good you have time to do. This advice - continuation of the first, because if you are going to celebrate all that is good, it will always be in your mind, and think about the bad times will not be simple.
• Be kind to others. It is difficult, but it is a fact. Evil men rate their level of happiness is much lower than good people. Not necessarily humbly endure whenever you offend - is wrong and even harmful. Just try to do something good, for example, engage in charity
• Appreciate real friends and not delay to communicate with them later. That "later" may never come, and you will lose a lot. It is no coincidence most people happiness is associated with a group of smiling people.
• Work. Many people think that happy people sit at home and do nothing. Well, or at least not run. This is not true. In fact, just a couple of months in this state - and you'll be grim due to the overwhelming boredom and melancholy. Work tones person allows him to self-realization and is a source of livelihood. The main thing - that it was a favorite, well-paid and do not turn you into a downtrodden horse.
• Be creative. Not all, even love, work leaves scope for creativity. Happy people - a creative people, so try to be creative in different spheres of life - for example, prepare your child a fun breakfast.

We would like to focus on relationships with men. Every woman dreams of finding the perfect mate, and only if she is truly happy. Therefore, as paradoxical as it may sound, to learn the secret of female happiness, it is necessary to answer the question: "how to make a man happy? "

Happy man - a proud man. Praise your partner and emphasize its strengths. Periodically surprises him and not let him get bored - for example, give him a wedding anniversary a new video game console, and spend the evening playing with them in a variety of races, shooters.

About the role of sex in the life of modern man not only heard dull. Here everything is clear - stay beautiful, sexy and desirable for their men (and maybe not only for him). Initiate intimacy themselves, because it will show him that sex with him for you - great fun. Consider his sexual needs - someone wants a permanent variety in sex, but for others there is no place better than the marriage bed.

Keep your man. Be interested in his life, work friends - but not intrusive, and that he realized that his life for you is very important. I agree with him when he scolds chief and regret it when he says that damn tired. Listen to it, rather than dismiss, saying: "What nonsense! "

And the most important thing. To keep her man happy to do periodically hold it from you. Play night at the computer, to drink beer with friends, or just to be without you. He will thank you for your understanding and will become even closer to you. Happy people come in and together and separately, and both of these conditions are the key to satisfaction.

To each his own

There is no one secret of happiness, no matter how trying to sell popular books. You can ask the question: "How to be happy? "Thousands of women, and everyone will find the recipe. All happy people are happy in their own way. But despite this, the experience of others is often useful to others, so here are some recipes will be published on the happiness of many different women:

"True happiness - love. How to sing The Beatles: «you're nobody until you do not love", and I agree with this. "

"I am happy when I have money. Let it sounds mercantile, but I was very exhausting their disadvantage. And it's not in the money, but the opportunities and freedom they provide. I hate to save, and choose which of the two thing I buy now, and some tomorrow. Happiness - when I can not do. "

"Happiness - it's when all alive and well. If so, then everything else - the small stuff "

"Happiness - it's all taken. In 16 years, Tatiana underwent cancer a year later learned that he could not have children in 25 years issued the custody of the four girls. Now these children have grown up, but continue to patronize Tatiana disadvantaged children. If you look from the side, the whole of life - for others. But she neskryvaemo happy. "

That's all. Not difficult, right? True happiness lies in every moment of life, and if you managed to find and catch - you are a happy person.

You probably pay attention to the fact that some people easily become the soul of the company, they are listening, they are admired. And all this sympathy can not explain just good looks - they have some magical and very special quality that makes them leaders. This quality has been called charisma. She became a symbol and source of success, so many people pressing question: "how to develop charisma? "

I am glad that charisma - quality is not innate, but acquired. But the desire to develop the charisma should not break a person. On the contrary, it can become the core of your personal growth and self-improvement. Therefore, do not change themselves, and try to improve and refine what you have.

The charismatic personality - who is it?

A charismatic person is not just a collection of some qualities - a mature and integrated personality. All kinds of people can develop their charisma: thick and thin, thoughtful and impulsive. But all these people have a common core, consisting of the following qualities:

• Self confidence

This, perhaps, is the very foundation on which is built the charisma. Confidence arises when you believe in their strength and the ability to achieve your goal. The emergence of this belief may prevent failures in the past, fear and anxiety, and various internal systems.

Past failures affect the perception of the present, in any case, however, they begin to interfere only when past experience is overestimated, and there is no boundary between the past and the future. You will be a clear recognition that the current situation is different from all previous ones, and you have every chance of success.

In case of strong fear and anxiety, try to understand the subject before the end of this fear. In most cases, you will come to a rather absurd conclusions - for example, you are afraid to speak of the fact that someone might not like what you're saying. But whether really like absolutely everything?

With internal complexes it is more complicated because it is well-established personal education, which is the cause of lack of confidence in their abilities, are often difficult to change. You can try to understand the causes of your uncertainty, but in the case of deep personal problems better to see a psychologist.

• Optimism and positive outlook on life

It is the second most important personal quality. On the basis of forecasts for the future, the assessment of current and past events, self-esteem and many personal setting. Optimism - a quality that needs constant training. Thinking about the future, try to provide all the details of the various positive options for the future. Negative variations do not necessarily dismiss - just not emphasized them.

• Awareness of personal responsibility for everything that happens to you

Agree, people look pity that all the failures that occur with them, blame circumstances, other people - in short, the whole world. Charismatic people understand that every person is worthy of the life he lives, and it is a consequence of his choice. When you make their own life, it attracts other people

There are excellent mental exercise in awareness of responsibility. It is called: "I - the author of his life." Its essence boils down to this - every time you happen some significant event, and answer for themselves the question: "How did I do it? "At first it will be difficult because of the internal resistance, but gradually it will take, and your mind will be reconstructed.

What matters is that taking responsibility for their lives did not develop in the responsibility for the whole world. This may be a ground for neurosis. For example, a person believes that if it is at a temperature of 39 degrees did not come to work, all the work will fall.

• Courage and independence

Sometimes a charismatic leader is required to take a risky and responsible decision, and it should have certain personal resources to do so. Others may put pressure, to argue and disagree with such a decision, but a charismatic leader able to stand up to them, sometimes alone.

The development of these qualities, you can start with a periodic replacement of the word "we" in the word "I". For instance, "We have not prepared a presentation" - "I have not prepared a presentation." When working on a project (and in all situations) tries himself as a leader and decision-maker responsible for the result.

• Develop their talents

Charismatic man knows himself, his strengths and weaknesses. Disadvantages he tries to compensate or pay into advantages and strengths - stress and provide them with the application. Therefore, development of charisma becomes important to find their calling and to be realized in this direction.

Each person has his talent, though sometimes there are difficulties in its search. But But here everything is very simple - focus only on themselves and try different activities - sooner or later, there is the same. Do not try to become the director of the plant, if discovered at a clear tendency to music - all the same probability of success is low.

• Respect for self and others

The charismatic person at any time can become a leader, leading the others. But this is impossible if a person overwhelmed with anger, irritation, or a dislike to him. People are attracted to the opposite - kindness, inner harmony and self-esteem.

Respect for self and others - are two sides of the same quality. When you allow yourself and others show the opposite qualities - for example, periodically to be smart and stupid, funny and sad - your anger and irritation go away by themselves, and in harmony reigns. Pay attention to the rigid framework that you are putting yourself and try to push them wider.

Secrets charismatic personality

These qualities and the installation is a strategic point of growth - they combine to make up the concept of "charisma." But there are also tactics - concrete steps and actions that in fact is the answer to the question: "how to develop charisma? "

1. Throws off negative. Negative emotions such as anger, fear and resentment arise for every man, only one of their stores in itself, and they become character traits. A person with charisma, too, experiencing them, but he is trying as quickly as possible to lose them, as well as accumulated tension. This can be done with sports, theater or just scream. You can also write a letter to offenders or beat any doll or stuffed toy.
2. Is the correct setting goals. First place in front of the global goals and then break them into intermediate and them - into even smaller. The implementation of each small goal mark something positive. That is how you bring the achievement of major goals.
3. Learn to speak. Eloquence - one of the main qualities of a charismatic leader. You can try to visit the oratory training. Learn to manage your voice, consider the characteristics of the audience at a performance, use different techniques of NLP software to make your speech expressive, and you - convincing.
4. Emphasize your individuality. Charismatic personality, tend to have a strong personality. To highlight it, create their own style of dress, get his manner of speaking, rehearse his trademark gestures - all of this can become your business card and set you apart from the crowd.
5. Become an expert in your field. Having defined the vocation, try as much as possible just to learn about this field - to read books, watch movies, interact with established people in this area and, of course, try to acquire practical experience.
6. Improve your communication skills. Communicate, learn to listen to others, set goals that motivate not only you but also other people. In the case of doing something in public, create a website - it will help interested people to quickly obtain the necessary information about you.

All of the above can be summarized in three main points: the independence and responsibility, self-presentation and the ability to motivate and influence others. This is the key point of growth, reliance on that will help you develop charisma. Use the above mental exercise and workout regularly, and the result will not be long in coming.